Once, when a relationship I loved but struggled with was ending, I felt convinced that if only he and I went to the spot of one of our first dates (a place we had returned to throughout our relationship and where we always felt calm and connected), we would somehow figure everything out. Of course, I didn't suggest we go there, and so we didn't, and the relationship came to its natural end. Looking back I don't think the place could have breathed new life into anything at the time, anyway, but what's striking to me is that, for a moment, I was certain that a place had the power to do so. Such is the power of a couple's secret, private space.
When we're growing up, forts made of blankets and secret clubhouses provide space for friendships and crushes to develop. And if you've seen the movie Up!, you perhaps have some thoughts on how one's childhood clubhouse can - with a little care, fresh paint, and the right partner-in-crime - create space for adult love to bloom.
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